The Scene:
Eilish is fresh from her bath, naked as a jay bird with her bath towel underneath her, lying on her change table. I’m applying lotion to her clean skin and Owen is milling around, going from room to room doing whatever it is he does when I’m not bothering him to pick up towels or feed the cat.
Jen: Eilish is totally massaging her feet.
Owen: She gets that from me, I’m always massaging myself.
Jen: Now she’s moved on to her legs. Oh….huh….um….she has discovered her…um…moon. SHE IS TOTALLY PLAYING WITH HER MOON! OK, deep breath. I don’t want he to think she’s doing anything wrong.
Owen (hiding in our bedroom): Vagina! Call it a vagina!
Jen: No way, I’m calling it a moon. Eilish, that is your moon, be careful, don’t hurt yourself. That’s right baby, that’s your moon.
Owen: VAGINA!
Jen: MOON!
Owen: VAGINA!
Eilish: Wassat?
Jen: It’s your moon lover.
Owen: Come on Jen, I really think we should call it a vagina.
Jen: Why?
Owen: You don’t want her to get made fun of when she goes to school.
Jen: First, why is she talking about her moon at school and second, I called it a cookeroonie for god’s sake and I’m relatively well adjusted.
Owen: Fine.
Jen: Fine.
{Silence}
Jen: I really gotta put her diaper on, she is freaking me out.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
3 comments:
So the funniest part of this post for me was not the moon/vagina discussion, or the fact that you so delicately tried to condone the touching of one's self...but that Owen said "I’m always massaging myself". My mind went there, oh yes it did.
BEST.
POST.
EVER!!!!!!!
P~
I hope you are writing a journal of all these wonderful episodes of Eilish's life. Moon is good for me; Andrea too is well adjusted (is she?) I love your writings Jenn; keep it up; it brightens my day. Can't wait to see you and Eilish on our birthday!!!!!
Post a Comment