Cry Baby

Owen came home from work Saturday morning to find me crying on the sofa. Nothing in particular was wrong, I just hadn’t had a good night sleep and was feeling kinda down. I’ve accepted that my hormones are completely out of whack – but it’s taking Owen a little longer to get there. Imagine working a very long night and coming home to your loving wife who you really hadn’t seen since Wednesday only to find her having a good cry for herself. How would you react? Well, Owen reacted by (of course) making me laugh by stating, ‘If anyone’s going to cry in this house, it’ll be me!’ Straight to heaven to that guy for putting up with Hormone Harriet the past 5+ months (plus our entire marriage, dating – basically since he met me!).

Today I had a doctor’s appointment and I’ve channelled all my apprehension for Dr. Pervy into love for his nurse. She’s the one who weighs me (up 2 pounds) and tells me it’s ‘good’, talks to me about my test results – also good, calls me honey, darling and refers to the bathroom as the loo even though she has no trace of a UK accent. So, having her at the beginning of my visit butters me up for Dr. Pervy who spends a total of 30 seconds with me, feeling my belly and listening to Junior’s heartbeat which frankly, I could listen to all day.

Throughout this pregnancy there’s been a lot of discussion about what we’re having. So far, only 3 people (Emma & Lori Dawson, Owen’s friend Tony) in our life think it’s a boy – the rest of ya’ll look at me and to quote Joanne P. think pink. Owen and I both think it’s a girl although we have no scientific proof of that fact. I just have a feeling while Owen figures staying up all night for a living has prepared him for having a daughter.

What I'm Listening To: Girls and Boys by Blur - how's that for irony?

20 Weeks - Halfway there!

Baby Connell is no longer growing according to the vegetable family and should be about 10 ounces and 6 ½ inches long head to toe, Mama Connell is enjoying wearing tops that fit her after
her birthday shopping spree and Papa Connell doesn’t think Uggs are as ugly as Crocs.

Owen took the above picture this morning when he got home from work to celebrate 20 weeks (5 months but not really) of Junior’s life on this planet. Although I look like a tank, for all the complaining I did at the beginning of my pregnancy, the truth is I’ve been really lucky. Lucky to have gotten pregnant as easily as we did, lucky that all the ultrasounds, blood work, doctor’s appointments are coming back ‘normal’. I still have 20 more weeks to go but have such a positive outlook on the remainder of this pregnancy. Someone remind me of this post after I give birth.

On the way to work this morning I heard the song ‘My Sharona’ and it got me to thinking that if you choose to name your child after a song or choose a name that is shared with a song you better make sure you like the song because I guarantee your child will have it sung to him/her their whole lives. In the case of ‘My Sharona’ you might want to think twice because I doubt you want your daughter associated with a song that has a line like: ‘I always get it up from the touch of the younger kind…my, my, my, my, my whoo! My Sharona’. You could go with Michelle (The Beatles, Guns N Roses), Mandy (Barry Manilow), Melissa (Allman Brothers), Jessie’s Girl (Rick Springfield) and Jolene (Dolly Parton) but again anyone who meets your new addition will invariably have those songs running through their heads. Given the stalemate Owen and I have come to regarding possible baby names, don’t be surprised if you meet Junior and find your self humming ‘Jack & Diane’.

Coming up next week: I have a doctor’s appointment this coming Monday and the ‘spine finding’ ultrasound this coming Tuesday.

You Say It's Your Birthday...

...it's (was) my birthday too yeah.

So, the big 3-2. Not much different than the big 3-1 to be honest. I had a wonderful extended birthday weekend in K-town which was filled with many, many loved one's and kisses from Eric. Who could ask for anything more?

Thanks to everyone for their gifts, cards, pictures and well wishes - you sure know how to make a girl feel loved.

19 Weeks

Baby Connell is the size of a small zucchini, Mama Connell saved $700 on auto insurance and Papa Connell thinks the ultrasound technician slipped and told us the sex of our baby.

So yeah, the ultrasound.

Our technician Alex was a low talker of Polish decent, which made most of our conversation go like this:

Alex: This is the mumble, mumble.
Jen: The what?
Alex: The mumble, mumble.
Jen: Oh. Right.

Body parts we saw for sure: the diaphragm, heart, right foot, left foot, spine (more on that later), and both hands.

Towards the end of the ultrasound it was apparent that Alex could not find the shot of the spine he was looking for and from the pressure he applied to the ultrasound….mouse?….wand? it was growing more evident to Owen and I that Alex was getting a little frustrated. I swear my belly feels bruised!

Finally he advised that I empty my bladder and move around a little to get the baby to change positions. So, I emptied my bladder walked briskly around the hallway and even jumped up and down for good measure. But Junior just wasn’t in the mood to show us his/her spine. I laid on my left side, my right side, even my stomach and…nada. Alex finally called a senior tech in to try his hand at getting Baby Connell to move positions but Carlos had no luck either. They told me to come back in 2 weeks as the doctor couldn’t report on the spine without actually seeing the spine– which seems reasonable to me.

Our actual report, which they gave us at the end of the ultrasound, had a lovely row of “normals” next to all Baby Connell’s organs with the exception of the spine which stated that due to the fetal position they couldn’t comment. So back again in 2 weeks to see Junior’s spine. I really don’t mind going at all – one of my favourite things about this pregnancy has been the ultrasounds – I love looking at Junior all nestled in my womb – just chillin’ giving the occasional high-five.

As far as Owen’s belief that Alex slipped and told us the sex, during the ultrasound Alex kept referring to the baby as “baby”. Owen says once while trying to get baby to move Alex referred to it as well….either he or she. I’m not telling and I didn’t hear what Owen heard so we’ll all have to wait 21 (!) more weeks to see if Alex really did spill the beans. Admit it - you're dying to know!

What I'm Listening To: 54-40

Junior Connell

Owen and I had our 19 week anatomical ultrasound today and everything was normal, normal, normal. I have to go back in 2 weeks to get a better picture of the spine because Junior had enough poking for one day and decided not to move at the very end so the technician couldn't get a clear shot of the spine. We tried everything: peeing, jumping, running in spot but Junior's a little stubborn - wonder where he/she gets that from?

Missing: 1 Mommy Gene

There is not a creative bone in my body – let’s get that out of the way up front.

During my pregnancy I’ve been paying attention to a lot of other Mom’s to see how they get things done. On top of the regular day-to-day Mom stuff like keeping your kids alive and your home from burning down, did you know that mothers do things like:

• Scrapbook
• Host Candle/Tupperware/Mary Kay/Pampered Chef parties
• Decorate their homes for: Easter, Thanksgiving, Halloween, Christmas
• Go to: Pumpkin Patches, Applie Orchards, Wiggles shows

While there is absolutely nothing wrong with doing any of the above things and I tend to get a little envious of the people who can do those, it is safe to say that I don’t think I’m going to be that type of Mommy.

First of all – see the first line. I am not creative. This statement isn’t being made in the hopes that you’ll leave comments saying that I am creative because the jig is up – I’m just not. While I enjoy looking at scrapbooks and attending the above parties if there is hooch being served, I don’t see myself actively participating in any of those things. Second, I think I have a little bit of adult ADD – I start things (a quilt, painting, photo albums, blog postings) and never follow them through. Thirdly, I come by it honestly – Judes wasn’t that type of mother either. In her case, she probably didn’t have a choice. Mom went back to work soon after Joel went to school full time and there was a time where Dad worked 3 shifts and Mom worked straight 3-11 – not really conducive to decorating Easter trees.

Before you lose faith in my mommy abilities, there are some things working in my favour:

• I’m a good cook and not a bad baker – when I have time to and want to be
• I can throw together an ensemle
• I have pretty good taste in music (even if Owen doesn’t agree that Junior loves Duran Duran and moved around tons yesterday during Girls on Film)
• We currently live in a city where there is lots to do. While I don’t see a lot of Wiggles concerts in my future, we’ll be sure to bring our kid to other shows. Mel has wonderful memories of her dad bringing her to Cyndi Lauper shows and I think that’s awesome
• I have a lot of creative family members who’ll ensure that our baby will go through his or her life experiecing different things (even if those things include snooping for Christmas gifts, opening them and then re-sealing them - which is the height of my creativity as a child).

What I'm Listening To: My manager typing beside me. I forgot my headphones today.

18 Weeks

Baby Connell is the size of a large sweet potato, Mama Connell has been applying Body Shop Cocoa Butter to her belly nightly to ward off the stretch marks and since Nan & Pop Kennedy visited, Papa Connell lost the battle of the nursery bedding.

Mama Connell - 1
Papa Connell - 0

This is the bedding that we (Judes and I) love. We're hoping to buy it after Christmas before Owen can come up with anymore brilliant bedding ideas!



Other than the bedding battle victory, not much to report this pregnancy week. We have another ultrasound this coming Tuesday so there will be a new picture of Junior to post. Apparently over the next 3 weeks the baby will double in size which is incredible. This ultrasound is anatomical and it's to make sure that the baby is growing in all the right places. It will also firm up my due date. Owen's still hoping for St. Patty's Day while I think March 8th would be nice as it is both our father's birthday's. Then again, maybe Junior will want a day all to him/herself.

What I'm Listening To: You Wouldn't Like Me - Tegan & Sara (thanks Joanne P.!)

Snooze

To say I'm not a morning person may be the understatment of the year. I like to joke that I come from a long line of sleepers. From Nan Lane, to Judes and Joanie, to Andrea and myself it is safe to say that we Lane girls enjoy a nice snooze. It is my understanding that cousin Jill also likes her beauty rest while cousin Lori is a bonified morning person and from all accounts always was - even before Ryan & Emma came on the scene. There are aunts who use apparatis to obtain a perfect night's rest and one could surmise that said aunts spent the majority of their adult lives pretty damn tired - so awesome is their new oxygenated sleeps.

I would love to say that Judes was such a non-morning person that I went to afternoon kindergarten but that is not the case. However, I do like to think that once Laura Kerr picked me up to walk me to school that Judes went back to bed. I remember being sick as a child and having Donnie K. be the one to check on me. While Judes is good under pressure she is not so good when awoken from a deep sleep. While visiting this weekend Judes told me that Donnie K. was a great help to her when Joel and I were babies - he'd help her with the night feedings. Between you and me (and until Judes reads this, buys a computer and posts a comment to defend herself) I believe that the reason Donnie K. was so "helpful" was because Judes just wouldn't wake up to feed us!

In college my roomates Susana and Weird Robin would often have breakfast together before class. As I stumbled out of my basement bedroom and walked by them they knew better than to engage me in some early morning chit chat. Susana liked to joke that they were lucky if I gave them a wave before heading up to the shower. She also went on to say that in her family not saying good morning when first seeing your family members was paramount to a slap in the face. The Kennedy's however - I don't think we spoke until after 11am. And that's the way we liked it. I have a recurring nightmare that I never really graduated college. In the dream there is a computer course that I never completed because it was Wednesday mornings at 8 or 9am. I honestly don't remember having ever attended that class but I must have graduated because I have the diploma to prove it.

In college, I could blame the late 'Tom Collins' nights on my need for sleep but when you're 31 (almost 32) and going to bed at 8:30pm there is no logical reason why getting to work at 9am should be such a problem. Yet it is. Owen believes that I just don't care about work because if I did I would never be late. He has never been late - unless I've done something to sabatoge his perfect attendance like take the car to work, even showing up on time the day of the great Toronto blackout. Judes, my sleep mentor has also never been late for work and she starts and an ungodly 6am. True, she goes to bed around 7:30pm but nonetheless she shows up everyday to do a job more physically demanding than anyone I know.

In less than 5 months I am going to be a mother and it is my understanding that while newborns sleep a lot, new mothers do not. In the baby books it suggests that new moms should sleep when their babies sleep but from talking to other mother's I get the impression that that rarely happens.

Long story short, the title of this post should have been "When is it appropriate to give your baby Tylenol PM's?"

What I'm Listening To: The washing machine.

17 Weeks

Baby Connell is the size of a large onion, Mama Connell is starting to lose faith in the weekly updates because last week Junior was the size of an avocado and isn’t an avocado bigger than even the largest onion? - and Papa Connell is a very good brother.

There are certain things that Owen is never going to understand – why he can’t use my salon shampoo, why I smile when watching television like the sitcom stars are my friends, how I can eat a peanut butter sandwich sans milk and why things cost what they cost. Case in point, I was telling him how expensive baby bedding was (especially the bedding I like) and he asked why we needed bedding for the crib.

And it went a little something like this:

Jen: So, you need a fitted sheet…
Owen: We already have fitted sheets.
Jen: You can’t put a queen size fitted sheet on a crib mattress. This is not the ghetto. You need a comforter…
Owen: I just brought you a brand new comforter from work. You said you loved it!
Jen: I really like the Nate Berkus (side note: Judes cannot believe he’s gay because he’s so handsome) QUEEN SIZE Comforter you brought home but it’s way too big.
Owen: (Silence)
Jen: And bumper pads.
Owen: What do you need bumper pads for?
Jen: Um, so Junior doesn’t roll into the wooden crib and suffer a concussion.
Owen: And you need special pads for that? Can’t you just put some foam around it and duct tape it?
Jen: (Red faced, hands drawn into a fist thinking that even crack whores get to buy bedding for their babies) No.
Owen: I’m sure your dad can put something together for the crib. I mean how long does the kid sleep in a crib anyway?
Jen: (Walking Away)
Owen: (Calling out to me) Yeah, I’m gonna ask Donnie K. if he can rig something up for the crib. Ha - I’m no rube.

Speaking of Owen, I recently showed him this blog and he’s threatened legal action if I’ve slandered him in any way. He’s thinking of writing his own blog called, “I don’t know why my wife doesn’t like me”.

What I'm Listening To: Sheena is a Punk Rocker - The Ramones ("She's a punk punk, punk rocker, punk punk punk rocker, punk punk rocker, punk punk punk rocker.")

Houston, we have movement!

I was just leaving the lunchroom when I felt the baby move for the first time. I had thought I was feeling it all along but given what just happened, the previous feelings may have been gas!

It's like that feeling when you're on a rollercoaster and you're coming down a big hill. Took my breath away.

Wow.

That whoosh, whoosh?

Today I heard the baby's heartbeat. This was my second doctor's appointment with Dr. H AKA Dr. Pervy (for doing a pap test on my first visit) and it lasted all of 3 minutes. I hopped up on the table, he put the dopplar thing on my stomach and said, "that whoosh, whoosh? That's the hearbeat". Owen wasn't with me so I didn't cry but I did have a good nervous laugh because that hearbeat is attached to the baby that I am going to have to give birth too and raise and oh my god what the hell have we gotten ourselves into?!?!?!.

I also found out that I had gained 2 pounds since my last visit which is, according to the nurse, "good". My next appointment with Dr. Pervy is October 30 and I'm set for an anatomical ultrasound on October 17. According to Dr. Pervy, if we wanted to know the sex, this was the ultrasound to ask for it. Officially we don't want to know the sex but unofficially it wouldn't take much to change my mind about that. I know Owen's not going to cave and is quite willing to go through the next 24 weeks not knowing what we're having. As time goes on, I'm getting more and more curious so we'll see how things go on October 17. Maybe Papa Connell will have a momentary lapse of reason and want to know the sex.

Yeah, right.

What I'm Listening To: Nothing. I'm waiting for Owen to call from work so I can do my "whoosh, whoosh" impression