Happy 35th Birthday to my Baby Daddy

...who doesn't want his picture on the Internet.

Time Out

Eilish has little patience. She comes by it honestly and neither do Owen and I. If something doesn't go her way, let's say a puzzle or something chances are she's going to throw that sucker and yell while doing it. Saturday night we were in the basement and she was playing with a toy car that Owen has (side note: why does Owen have a toy car? He is not a car guy.) and when she couldn't get the hood up, she tossed it across the room.

As all my parenting tips come from TV, I employed a Super Nanny tactic of putting Eilish is 'time out'. I sat her on the arm chair, told her that she shouldn't throw things, how Mommy and Daddy don't throw things (we just curse under our breath) and that she had to sit in the chair for a few minutes until she calmed down. I told her, 'don't move' and perhaps, perhaps pointed my finger while I said it. As I was explaining all this to her, she looked me in the eyes, pointed her finger and said, 'don't move'. I turned away from her to laugh my ass off and reboot the computer and when I turned back to see how the time out was going she pointed her finger at me and said, 'don't move'. That chair has now been christened the 'don't move' chair and everytime she sits in it she points her finger and says 'don't move'.

I don't know if the time out worked. The TV was on so basically she was sitting in her chair watching Toopy & Binoo but she didn't throw anything else….that night. Sunday was a different story.

Here is an outtake from the great Christmas card photo shoot of 2008. This is pretty much how she looks at me when I try to explain the concept of time out.

Happy Birthday Uncle Joel!

With love from your best girl.

Saucy is as Saucy does

What does 'saucy' mean to you? This weekend I said (and this is a direct quote), 'there is nothing worse than a saucy kid'. I realized today that I have no idea what that means. Is saucy the same as bratty? Some may say that I am saucy and I would have to agree but I don't think I am bratty. I've come to take saucy as a compliment which may mean I've confused saucy confused with sassy.

I think Eilish is saucy and that it wasn't a learned behavior, that she was born like that - it's hereditary. Case in point:

She woke up from her nap at Mom's house sweaty and unhappy wanting to be held by me of all people (usually she doesn't want much to do with me at Mom's house since she has Judes, Donnie K. and Joel at her beck and call willing to keep her hopped up on cake and chocolate milk - but I digress). So I was holding her in my arms, patting her bum and Mom sat on the side of the couch to talk to her and rub her head. She pushed Judes away and said no. Every time Mom sat down she tried to push her off the couch. Mom had just worked all day and was just looking for some lovin' but E wasn't having any of it.

This isn't the first time she's resorted to violence. There has been a Michael pushing episode, her unwillingness to share crayons and there may have been a crayon thrown last week but I'm denial about it.

Owen's reaction to any sauciness is to have a sit down chat with Eilish, explaining in a calm and rational fashion what she did wrong and why she shouldn't do it. My reaction goes a little something like this: 'Dude, have you LOST YOUR MIND?! You don't do that! Mama doesn't do that to you! You've gone right off your head! '

Another example of her sauciness is her reaction to a kiss request. Eilish doesn't give kisses without being asked for one (unless you are her mild mannered Dad) and even if you ask for one nicely 9/10 times you're not getting one. I've asked her for a kiss only for her to say no and then turn around and kiss an inanimate object such as the couch or her coloring book. And she knows what she's doing because she'll look right at me as if to say, 'watta ya think of this Mama?'. Again, that is not learned behavior, I have to my knowledge never kissed a couch!

Eilish: 50% Connell, 50% saucy.

Viewer Discretion was Advised

It's been a tough couple months for the Kennedy (and Connell) family but I'm happy to report that Donnie K. is doing well after being subjected to every test our medical system threw at him including being poked and prodded in an area that for intents and purposes is an exit.

To celebrate the good news Owen, Eilish and I visited Kitchener yesterday where Eilish charmed the pants off everyone, except for Uncle Joel who was already in his pajamas. To quote Lillie Mae, Eilish is 'growing like the hop'. Here's a picture of Eilish with her Pop shortly before she demanded half of his steak.









Thanks to everyone for their kind words and prayers.

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Eilish

Last night Eilish said the word 'crouch' while crouching.



MENSA here we come!

Eilish to English Dictionary

Eilish is talking up a storm and is beginning to put small sentences together. For instance, 'I get' - she will go get whatever you just asked her about or 'I see moon' as in, it's dark outside, I see the moon. It is not always easy to understand what she is trying to say so I present to you the first ever Eilish to English dictionary.

1. Puss = Purse (she thinks her plastic Fischer Price bag that holds her little people is her purse)

2. I get puss = I will go get my purse

3. Gar'ic = Garlic (said in whispers and in growls, Eilish learned the word garlic last week while I was watching a cooking show. After she whispers/growls the word she will sometimes add 'mmmm, good').

4. cho mil = chocolate milk (she loooves chocolate milk and once she has finished her cup will look at you and ask 'more?'

5. co = color

6. co Mama = would you like to color Mama? Somewhere along the way Eilish started calling me 'Mama', and it might be the cutest thing she says.

7. Boo Tee = beauty mark (I am covered in beauty marks and Eilish has one on her hand)

8. Boo Tee Mama Fas = Beauty Mark on Mama's Face

9. Ill bit = A little bit (as in I would like to help you put a little bit of cream on my face and when we are done I would like 'more'.)

10. Wassat = Dude, what is that?!

11. Hello = she started saying hello last night but sounds like Uncle Leo from Seinfeld that is a male Jewish Senior Citizen, hellooooooo.

Where have I been?

Where have you been?


Such a long time since I last posted. I have felt like I don't have much to say now that I'm back at work. It's been a long 8 months since I returned from maternity leave and the weeks are starting to all run into each other. I did promise Aunt Pat in Newfoundland that I would update this blog soon. Given that I'm checking Andrea's blog everyday for her baby news, it seems fitting to update my 'readers' on my own baby.

Eilish is currently 19 1/2 months old. She had her needle last week (a month late - holy cow is it hard to work and schedule appointments!) and that went as well as expected. She is a whopping 25 pounds 11 ounces and 2 feet 10 inches tall which is apparently off the charts for her age. I have no idea where she is getting her height from, but it's not me! She is talking up a storm and when Owen calls me from home I can hear her in the background repeating the last word he said.

I am going to make a serious effort to update this blog on a more regular basis. In the meantime, have you heard that Eilish is going to have a new cousin?

A Difference of Opinion

Owen: So Tony and I were talking and he was saying that Charlene (Tony's girlfriend) got presents on Easter. And then I said, Jen totally got presents at Easter.

Jen: I remember the best Easter ever, I was in Grade 5 and I got a Michael Jackson t-shirt and the Thriller album.

Owen: So then we were saying like who gets presents at Easter? It's not exactly a gift giving holiday.

- Silence -

Jen: Eilish is for sure getting presents at Easter...

Owen: Well I don't know, maybe chocolate or something small.

Jen: I'm not talking a car but she is FOR SURE getting presents at Easter. AND Valentine's Day AND Halloween.

Owen: Don't you think we should talk about stuff like this?

Jen: Listen, have you met my family? You go ahead and give her piddly little chocolate bunnies come Easter. My family will take care of the rest.

Owen: When I was growing up...

Jen: Oh lord...

Owen: Exactly, it's a religious holiday.

Jen: And the Baby Jesus would want Eilish to have presents.

Owen: I can't win this one can I?

Jen: Nope, not even close. Good try though.

Goodnight Moon

The Scene:

Eilish is fresh from her bath, naked as a jay bird with her bath towel underneath her, lying on her change table. I’m applying lotion to her clean skin and Owen is milling around, going from room to room doing whatever it is he does when I’m not bothering him to pick up towels or feed the cat.

Jen: Eilish is totally massaging her feet.

Owen: She gets that from me, I’m always massaging myself.

Jen: Now she’s moved on to her legs. Oh….huh….um….she has discovered her…um…moon. SHE IS TOTALLY PLAYING WITH HER MOON! OK, deep breath. I don’t want he to think she’s doing anything wrong.

Owen (hiding in our bedroom): Vagina! Call it a vagina!

Jen: No way, I’m calling it a moon. Eilish, that is your moon, be careful, don’t hurt yourself. That’s right baby, that’s your moon.

Owen: VAGINA!

Jen: MOON!

Owen: VAGINA!

Eilish: Wassat?

Jen: It’s your moon lover.

Owen: Come on Jen, I really think we should call it a vagina.

Jen: Why?

Owen: You don’t want her to get made fun of when she goes to school.

Jen: First, why is she talking about her moon at school and second, I called it a cookeroonie for god’s sake and I’m relatively well adjusted.

Owen: Fine.

Jen: Fine.

{Silence}

Jen: I really gotta put her diaper on, she is freaking me out.

Words of Wisdom for Eilish When She's a Teenager

This morning on the Go Train I saw 4 teenagers making their way downtown. They were dressed like they were auditioning for Rock of Love (holla!) and I just sat there praying that when the time comes Eilish would make better decisions about her hair/make-up/wardrobe than these girls were making.

So, Eilish:

1 - Always make sure your bra fits you properly. There is nothing worse than an ill-fitting bra that gives you the appearance of 4 boobs.

2 - A tank top that comes with a bra built in is not acceptable if your boobs are bigger than a B. Given you lineage, I see no bra tanks in your future.

3 - Let's just say no to thongs right now. We can revisit when you're old enough to vote.

4 - It's best to wear make-up that gives the appearance of no make-up, so skip the lip liner or bright eye shadow. It's not cute and you may end up looking like a hooker - the truth hurts my love.

5 - Try not to touch your face during the day or pick at any pimples you might have. It leads to scars and scars are forever.

6 - If your shoes hurt when you put them on, chances are they will hurt all day so bring an extra pair just in case.

7 - During your lady days try to stay prepared. Have everything you'll need in case of an emergency with you in your purse/bag etc.

8 - Don't slouch.

9 - You are prettier than you think you are.

10 - If you're with a group of friends and they are 'acting a fool' don't feel like you have to along with them. It's fine to laugh and appreciate their foolishness but you don't want to be the person who feels like you have to outdo everyone. You don't have to be the loudest.

11 - Just because everyone's doing it, doesn't mean you have to. You don't have to be a killjoy but you also don't have to be 13 years old planning how wasted you're going to get this weekend. In my experience, peer pressure is a crock. Kids who want to drink at 13 want to drink it all and won't call you a loser if you don't. And if they do, whatev - when you're 19 these people won't even be your friends anymore.

12 - I don't care about what you want to do with your hair but if it's going to be long, it has to be clean. If it's going to be colored it should be done professionally so it's not green.

13 - Let's try and limit piercings to ears for now because the healing process of an eyebrow ring ain't cute.

14 - It's OK to be a kid once in awhile. You are going to feel some pressure to grow up fast because girls tend to mature faster than boys, but that doesn't mean you have to try and be an adult. It's hard enough being a teenager.

15 - If you keep making this face, you're going to have the same wrinkle above your nose as your Mama:

Eilish is Bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S

Somewhere along the way Eilish has picked up some interesting habits. There are some things that she does to mimic things Owen and I do and there are some things she’s picked up along the way that I can’t account for. For instance sometimes when drinking, she’ll hold water in her mouth and slowly dribble it out over her chin. She will do it over and over again. Owen and I generally don’t react when she does this, if you can count hiding my face and laughing my ass of as ‘not reacting’, but I don’t think she does it for attention. I think she likes the way that it feels, the water slowly moving its way down her chin, her neck, her shirt. Last night she added a new facet to that move by leaning against the couch and tilting her head way back as to extend the water pleasure.

If you ask her where her hands are, she just won’t show you her hands, she raises them in what can only be described as ‘jazz hands’ move and keeps her fingers splayed (?) out and in front of her face, it’s the oddest thing and I don’t know why she does it.

When she sees our cat Lucy she always lets out a high pitched ‘ooooh’ sound. Not a ‘meow’ like she does when she sees a picture of a cat but more of a mimic-y sound in a response to Lucy’s cries. She will do it sometimes to my parent’s cat but always to Lucy.

She has also started doing yoga poses limited to downward facing dog and will rest her head on the floor while her bum bobs in the air.

She no longer gives kisses unless you can prove to her you are going bye-bye unless it’s when she gives unsolicited kisses for seemingly no reason except you just happen to be there.

Even when full she will eat whatever Cheerio she comes across even if she came across it while looking under the couch.

When climbing the stairs she loses speed around step 4 where she picks up and piece of dust she can find and holds it up to show me like she can’t keep going unless these stairs have been cleaned.

She’s started splashing in the tub with such intent and fervor that she almost scares herself.

The kid is cookoo.

She loves her Poppy, but she's still cookoo.

Working Mother - is there any other kind?

Monday was hard. I was up at the ass crack of dawn and in an attempt to not wake Eilish; I dried my hair in the basement, put my make-up on in the hallway and straightened my hair in the living room. Owen was up to see me off at 7:10 when Lee Ann picked me up and E got up around 7:30. I didn’t cry until after work when Owen and Eilish picked me up at the Go Station. I ran to the car crying and hopped in the back seat with E but all she was interested in was my purse. Owen spent the day with our girl and she had a great time with him.

Tuesday was more of the same although I didn’t cry after work. Tuesday evening was very rushed because I want to hang out with Eilish until she goes to bed so after that I was doing dishes (Owen did offer to do them) and cleaning bottles. Owen spent the day with our girl and had a great - but exhausting – day. Tuesday evening I had an attack of conscience, wondering if I was doing the right thing being back at work.

Wednesday is Eilish’s first day with Liz and Owen said the hand-off went well. Liz brought Eilish a CD of nursery rhymes to listen to (guess she’s not a big Carly Simon fan?!) and filled out the form that I left so Anal Mama Jen could know when Eilish ate, slept and pooped. When I got home Wednesday Eilish climbed up on me and gave me an unsolicited smooch so Wednesday was a good day.

Thursday is when things get a little hairy at our house. I can’t leave until Owen gets home in the morning so I have to be up, showered and ready for when E wakes up but it’s nice to have breakfast with her and be the first face she sees in the morning. Liz arrives at 9:30 so Owen can go to sleep. I didn’t see Liz yesterday as Owen let her go when he woke up so it was nice to come home to my little family.

This morning I didn’t get up in time to shower when Eilish woke up so I’m sporting a pony tail and my eyebrows have bed head. My pants are too tight and I have a meeting over lunch which is pretty cruel for your first week back. Can’t wait to ‘sleep in’ tomorrow until Eilish gets up at 7:30. I remember when sleeping in meant noon!

All in all a very busy week. Eilish seems very happy and Liz has been good about filling out my forms and telling me how wonderful Eilish is. Owen seems very tired and it’s weird not seeing him as much as I did when I was off. I am slowly adjusting to being back at work but am enjoying using the bathroom without having to bring Eilish with me!

Things to Do Before Work on Monday - UPDATED

- Get pants hemmed (done March 29)

- Buy GO train ticket (found the old one - woo hoo!)

- Wrap head around the fact that I am going back to work after 13 months off (still working on it)

- Remind Nanny that Eilish is the most precious, smartest, funniest, perfect baby in the world and must be told so 40 times a day (put off until Wednesday)

- Figure out if the kids are still wearing make-up to work (yep, they sure are)

- Remember how to apply make-up (I'll get back to you)

- Stop crying about the fact that I'll be getting up even earlier now that E sleeps until 8 (this one still burns!)

- Stop worrying that Owen is going to take Eilish out in public wearing striped shirt and plaid pants (dude, I've got bigger fish to fry)

- Make chart for Nanny so that I can know what Eilish did every minute of everyday including bowel movements (done March 30)

- Sync iPod (as we speak)

- Make and freeze a lasagna (done and done)

- Remember pass key PIN (I got nothin')

- Figure out who will have the pleasure of buying me lunch on my first day back (still up for debate)

- Try not to cry (already did, tonight after dinner)

Funny Things Eilish Has Done This Week

1. Danced to 'You're So Vain' by Carly Simon
I was on a Carly Simon kick this week after reading an article about her in Vanity Fair so I popped in her Greatest Hits and went directly to #5 - You're So Vain. Eilish was standing up at the coffee table and her left leg just started moving. She does this kind of bendy thing with it to the beat of the music and ducks her body towards the table like it's a bar and she just finished an ill-advised shot of sour apple - like she's her Mama's child. I thought it was a fluke until I put it on today before Owen left work and the dancing started again. Owen plays music all the time but it's mostly very deep music so E usually just sits in his lap as they contemplate world hunger or whatever Bono is bitching about these days. But not Carly, oh no, Carly moves her.

2. Played 'Where is Eilish' with Mama & Daddy
After her bath this week, in an attempt to keep her laying on the change table as opposed to trying to catapult herself off, I put part of the towel over her face and asked 'Where's Eilish?' to which she pulled the towel off and laughed one of her laughs. She then put the towel back and as I was getting ready to ask 'Where's Eilish?' she started what could only be described as mutter to herself, like 'she's never gonna find me here', so I called Owen in and we dragged the question out to see if the muttering was a fluke, 'Where is Eilish Daddy? I swear she was just here a minute ago...is she under the bed, is she in the closet?' And she muttered the whole time. It might not be reading as funny as it was because I swear y'all, I almost peed my pants.

12 days until I go back to work...mutter, mutter.

Happy 1st Birthday Baby

From this:

To this:

And it only took a year! Thanks for the laughs, the tears and the love. Mommy & Daddy don't know what they would do without you. You are the funniest, coolest, sweetest kid we know and we are so glad that you're ours.

How about a cookie for dessert tonight?

OK, OK some ice cream instead, now stop giving me your Baby Clint Eastwood look.

Love Mama

This is the place where Eilish:

- gets dropped off while her Mama gallivants off to the States for a little (A LOT) of shopping with 2 J's and an A

- is carried around like the Queen she is for 24 hours

- shares her toast and chicken nuggets with her Poppy

- gets all dolled up to go shopping with her Nanny & Poppy to buy a new chair

- gets put in the corner in said chair after 'jawwing' at her Poppy

- climbs the stairs

- rocks her MUN shirt

- charms the pants off her Uncle Joel - literally

- plays in the empty bathtub

- has her own crib

- tires her Nanny & Poppy out so much that they are in bed shortly after she hits the sheets

- needs a few different jammies because sometimes Nanny & Poppy can't figure out the zippers

- changes clothes a few times a day if the grandparents think she's uncomfortable in her cords

- learned that whatever happens at Nanny & Poppy's stays at Nanny & Poppy's

- has to have a little rest because charming these Kennedy's is hard work

Eilish and Peas - A Love Story

Owen and I don't have very good eating habits. A lot has to do with the fact that we are on 2 completely different schedules so the nights that he's off we find ourselves eating dinner late. Add having a baby to that and there were times where we were eating dinner around 9pm, after E had been bathed/bottled/bedded. The days that he is off I try to make a nice dinner for us, more often than not a pasta concoction or a stir fry or other foods that I know Owen will like. It's not that he's overly picky, he just tends to like more homey foods such as chili or stew whereas I could eat a chicken stir fry everyday. I like stinky cheeses and he doesn't, so any dishes with goat or asiago cheese are consumed when Daddy is at work. The moral of the story is that we tend not to get our 3 balanced meals in everyday.

So Eilish comes along and I want her to be a better eater than we are so for now that means no junk for the little belly. Any crap we eat is done after she's gone to bed. It won't always be like this but I feel like she's starting off with a clean slate so why mess her up with fries and cookies and cakes (yes, she will have cake at her party, I don't want any relatives calling children's services on me!) especially when lately it's getting hard to get her to eat anything while she's teething. Side note: we have front teeth! I'll try to get a picture of them soon!

I know a lot of this is New Mommy stuff and if (giant if, oh my god I can't even think about it) we ever had another child, things might be different but for now I'm the Mom and I control what Eilish is going to eat. I figure if I'm going to be the one to clean it up (if you know what I mean) I better make sure it's somewhat healthy!

We've started introducing her to the foods we eat and she has taken a liking to pasta and chicken etc. (I made meatballs with extra lean beef and I swear she ate 2 on her own). The big thing for her is being able to feed herself and trying to get some pureed vegetables in her gullet is starting to get difficult. So while grocery shopping I came across some frozen peas and since she loves pureed peas by way of baby food, I thought I'd give them a try. Dude, she loved them and I loved watching her eat them. As an adult who only recently started enjoying cooked veggies herself, I get so much joy out of watching Eilish feed herself veggies.

And now you can too:

I Just Don't Know What to do With Myself

For the 4th day in a row, Eilish has napped for over 2 hours. This is a kid who would nap for a wopping 20 minutes and then be ready to party all night. For 3 of the 4 past nights though she has woken up crying which we are attributing to her 2 front teeth that have finally broken through. I can't think of anything worse than her being in pain with her teeth but am curious as to why it bothers her the most at 3am as opposed to 3pm.

My boss called today to remind me that I am due to return to work, like I needed reminding. He seemed to have forgotten that I had some vacation time accrued and was returning March 31 as opposed to his magical date of March 10 which immediately sent me into a panic. I have so much to do before I go back to work and needed the 21 days to procrastinate! The worry was well worth it when he called me back to let me know that when I do return I'll have 4 weeks vacation remaining for 2008 as opposed to the 3 weeks I thought I had - so that is awesome news. We are expecting some visitors over the summer, cousin Jamie and sister Carmel so hopefully I'll be able to take some days to visit with them.

Duty calls - the babes has awoken. If anyone is awake at 3am give me a call - I'll be up!

I'm Back

See this face?

This is the face of an 11 month old who:

- loves to start the clapping and if you don't clap along will look at you like, hey, why aren't you clapping? Everyone else is clapping, why aren't you clapping?

- loves her Daddy. I mean looooves her Daddy. Owen is the sun, the moon and the stars to Eilish, while I am....the maid.

- is a Lady and a lady crosses her ankles when she sits

- will throw food on the floor when she's done eating

- will throw her cup on the floor when she's done drinking

- will throw her Strawberry Shortcake, bunny, bottle and soothers 1, 2, & 3 out of her crib when she doesn't want to sleep or has frankly slept enough

- will close her eyes and shake her head when you present her with something to eat that she finds unsatisfactory

- loves blueberries

- poops whole blueberries

- says da da da all day long but ma ma ma when she's crying

- does not like getting her face washed or her bum changed

- found her belly button and loves to look at it and then yours and then kiss your belly

- kisses with her mouth open

- sleeps with one soother in her mouth and one in each hand tucked under her

- is the reason I get up in the morning and the reason Owen works so hard

- is gonna miss her Great Nanny Lane when she goes home tomorrow